But why should I feel this way? I have such goodness in my life and yet I can't appreciate it. I have tried chasing away the negative emotions by listing the reasons I should be grateful. I have forced myself to dance to peppy music. I have banged out Beethoven on my piano in ways that would make him spin in his grave.
Nothing helps. Does anyone have advice? I wish I could move on to acceptance already. I know I am missing out on life by feeling down and upset. And I know that my attitude is the only part of this process under my control. So why can't I learn to bear this with grace?